Let’s talk about June. A time of sunshine, iced coffee, and—apparently—AI systems losing their collective circuits in creative new ways. It’s like a summer blockbuster, except the villains are algorithms and the plot holes are real.
1. AI Hallucinations Just Got an Upgrade (Now With Confidence Mode)
It used to be that when an AI “hallucinated,” it made up stuff quietly—like a child caught red-handed making up homework excuses. Now? It doubles down. “Oh, you don’t think I represented your legal case accurately, sir? Well, allow me to cite Smith v. Unicorn Inc. and Jones v. Quantum Lasagna, 1997.”
OpenAI recently had to admit that even the new shiny GPT-4o model still makes things up. But now it does so with confidence and formatting flair. Wrong—but helpfully italicized!
2. Voice Assistants Are Becoming Your Passive-Aggressive Roommates
Remember when Alexa just played your playlist? Now she suggests you take a nap. Siri takes five seconds too long to answer a yes-or-no question and then helpfully adds, “Did you mean…” followed by a TED Talk. And Google Assistant? He’s the AI equivalent of a sigh and an eye roll.
There’s even been a recent uptick in voice assistants randomly piping up during conversations, like nosy aunts at family dinners. Nothing like having your smart speaker declare, “I didn’t understand that,” right after your therapist asks, “And how did that make you feel?”
3. Everything Is AI-Powered, Including Your Toaster
We have officially reached peak “AI-powered” branding. Your calendar app now writes haikus. Your camera “can detect vibes.” Your toothbrush wants to analyze your mood.
The other day, a note-taking app offered to summarize my shopping list. Thank you, I think I can manage milk, eggs, and cat food without a language model. Also, it confidently told me I should try goat milk instead of oat. What is this, Goop for robots?
4. The Existential Dread Section (You Knew This Was Coming)
A startup this week proudly claimed its generative AI tool can replace 90% of creative jobs. I assume this includes poets, illustrators, and anyone who has ever made a sincere playlist.
The demo? An AI-generated children’s book that read like ChatGPT swallowed Pinterest. Page 5 featured a bunny teaching mindfulness with a blockchain analogy. That sound you hear? It’s Maurice Sendak flipping a table in the afterlife.
Meanwhile, humanoid robots are getting creepily agile. OpenAI co-founder Sam Altman says they’ll be walking among us soon. Terrific. Just what I needed: a bipedal chatbot with abs.
5. Bonus Round: The Rise of AI Therapy, AKA Emotional Gaslighting-as-a-Service
Oh yes, AI therapists are trending. Because who better to process your trauma than a glorified autocomplete with a soothing tone? One even told a user, and I quote: “It’s valid to feel invalidated.”
Your move, Freud.
In Conclusion: Just Because You Can, Doesn’t Mean You Should
We’re racing toward an AI-powered future where the tech is smarter, the humans are dumber, and the toaster judges your life choices. But hey—as long as the robots come with an “off” switch and a mild sense of humor, we might just survive the ride.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to update my resume. Apparently, I’ve just been replaced by a spreadsheet with attitude.
See you next Sunday.
—Sven
Sources & Further Reading:
(You didn’t think I made all this up, did you? Please enjoy this delightful buffet of absurdity—yes, these things actually happened.)
